The 36 Questions that can make you FALL IN LOVE with anyone.
Getting to know someone is a process, and just like any process, it's important not to rush it if we want it to last. In the age of internet and the latest trends being social media and online presences, it can be hard to truly connect with people whether they are new acquaintances or old relationships. We have our online profiles and just share what we want the world to know, which can prohibit people from getting to know the true person. Also, much of what is posted on social media is more of a highlight reel rather than what is truly real, which further isolates us and makes us feel like there might be something wrong with us if we're not as happy as everyone else appears to be. That's the thing, it's mainly just about appearances and image on social media, so keeping that in mind can help. Fostering true connections with others is something that requires time and nurturing, and it can't come in some ready-made package. A worthwhile bond is a foundation that takes years to create and sustain.
There are, however, things you can do to get to know someone better or to rekindle an old relationship and create a deeper connection. These questions are designed to boost intimacy between people whether they are strangers or have known each other for years. There are so many things that we don't know about people and that can only be known if we ask questions. Psychologist, Dr. Arthur Aron devised these 36 questions from a 1997 SUNY Stony Brook study that investigated whether intimacy could be developed quicker between two strangers by asking certain questions to each other. Dr. Aron saw that these questions were able to bring people closer together by each question diving deeper into the psyche and personality of the person being asked the questions. They take about 45 minutes to go through thoroughly and can also be great dinner table conversation starters. If there's any relationship you would like to foster or create, you can write down these questions to ask the person of your choosing and respectfully, answer them yourself so they can also learn more about you too. Maybe you'll each learn a bit about yourself in the process too.
You could even ask these questions to yourself and journal your own responses. It would be a great self-exploration exercise and would help you create a closer connection with yourself which would be awesome. Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship of all since it sets the tone for all of the other relationships in your life. Knowing yourself, your likes, dislikes, emotions and dreams, is the key to living a fulfilled life. When you are already content with yourself, relationships with others are a great bonus instead of a deep desperation to be filled. You can even answer the questions in your head or in an email to yourself if you don't write in a journal. Have some fun with it and see what you find out about yourself. When you're doing these with other people, you don't even have to do them all at once, you can just choose a few of your favorites and ask them while you're spending time with someone. It could be over coffee, or while out for a walk, or even while driving in the car on a road trip. Some of the questions on the list include "If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?" and "What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?". Enjoy the questions and be sure to save them for future use.***
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